37 Weeks, 5 Days: Irritable Much?

So….. For some reason I’m starting to feel extremely irritated by everyone. I’m dreading the endless comments I get from people at church. Their eyes are all over my bump (not so much their hands, thankfully), and the only things anyone says to me are about the arrival of the baby: “When will this little one make an appearance?, when’s the baby going to come?, how much longer?”

How should I know?? Baby will come out when the baking is done!

Of course I UNDERSTAND why no one can focus on anything else when they look at me. I’m all baby right now, and I have and would do the same to any other pregnant woman (nothing else in life really trumps the soon arrival of a new baby). For some reason, though, knowing the logic behind this does not keep my stress and irritation from rising with every well-meaning comment, question, or piece of advice.

I’d like to be invisible while I try to make it from the sanctuary to the bathroom. I don’t want people to see the shape of my tummy, the baby’s kicks, or (especially) the lumpy nature I take on during one of my oh-so-frequent Braxton Hicks! My husband is the one I want to see this stuff, and he is basically the only one, other than certain close friends (and children- I LOVE their comments, touches, and questions!)

So that’s honestly how I feel today and how I have begun to feel more and more in recent weeks, but I feel SO guilty for feeling this way! Is it some kind of maternal protective instinct? Will I feel less hostile when I’m no longer pregnant? Will I feel MORE this way?? Yikes….

I’m sure also that if people didn’t say anything I’d be irritated as well, and that makes me feel irrational. I think I’ll just declare irrational my new normal and go with that…

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7 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. the heart & art
    Dec 02, 2012 @ 00:04:21

    I felt the same way towards the end of my pregnancy also. It’s funny you mention church, because as pastor’s daughter I really felt like I was under a
    microscope. Being an anxious person, and feeling that added pressure with the 21 questions is indeed irritating. So you’re not irrational thinking. I understand the feeling.

    Reply

    • travelnole
      Dec 02, 2012 @ 00:34:58

      I’m a pastor’s daughter too, though I live in a completely different part of the country now 🙂 It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one to have these feelings. I felt really happy today that I’m planning to give birth at home where I’ll have plenty of privacy!

      Reply

      • the heart & art
        Dec 02, 2012 @ 01:00:16

        Good for you! It must be feel so great to make these choices and have that distance from all the questions, possible criticism and misunderstandings. Being a PK isn’t easy, and I’m happy I found a fellow blogger who has been in my shoes.

  2. andi
    Dec 02, 2012 @ 01:20:37

    im so glad you are going through this before me so i can ask you incessant questions later

    Reply

  3. laughingpromises
    Dec 02, 2012 @ 17:43:04

    Oh man, I know just what you mean! I go to a house church, so I can’t just disappear or try to disappear (although I don’t know if that would be possible in a bigger church, either, really). Well, yesterday at church, I wanted to move seats because I was super uncomfortable in the one I was sitting in. I tried so hard to be subtle and not interrupt, but 2 of the ladies rushed to my aid to make sure I wanted to sit in the chair I was scooting over. I know they were just trying to make sure I’m comfortable and taken care of, but I just wanted to do it with no fusses. And then later, one of the ladies told me I’d better make sure to keep my feet propped up (ugh). Again, I know she’s just looking out for me, but all the advice is getting real old real fast.

    Reply

    • travelnole
      Dec 02, 2012 @ 23:49:53

      Yes, I hate it when people act like I can’t do ANYTHING for myself or like I’m a catastrophe waiting to happen! Well-intended to be sure, but frustrating, right??

      Reply

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